The Day Before You Forget It All Completely
I play you a symphony of memories, a mosaic
of the past to swim in, one last time.
I play you audio from old friends and family,
show you old Hi-8 recordings on the big screen,
Christmases, birthdays, but not your marriage.
I furnish the past beneath your feet, red carpets
elegant and sublime, for you to embrace and charm,
to have and to hold, from this day forth.
Till tomorrow, anyway. Perhaps. If we’re lucky.
I bring you necklaces, bracelets and ornaments,
all the times you spent searching the country
for the finest wind chimes, jewellery and furniture.
I read you poems that used to make you happy,
a poem published at a train station, a love letter
to life, liberty and you, always you, waiting.
I cut fruit for you, the way you like, present a bowl
filled with cheese and chocolate, you loved your treats.
Tea and sympathy, passing on through, passing on.
You know who I am, for the very last time.
You talk about me as a child, so painfully quiet,
how I’d stand behind you when the relatives came.
You still run and play in the craters during the war,
still hide in burned out homes, play hide and seek,
make the best of things, growing up so happy.
You remember dances and dating, such a catch,
fun and fabulous car rides and music, living
your best life, laughter and love, embraced.
All this history, all of it, fading, fading, so fast.
We try to touch it, hold it tight, but like running water
it rushes past so quickly now, erased, erased.
I can see it all, rubbed out, face blanked, confused,
left with silences, bewilderment, aware that something
is missing, somewhere, something vital, important, blessed.
Silence slips in. You always hated silences.
Peter Devonald is widely published including London Grip, Door=Jar, Bluebird Word, Metachrosis, Vipers Tongue and the6ress. Winner Waltham Forest Poetry Award 2022, Heart Of Heatons 2023/ 2021 and FofHCS 2023. Nominated Forward Prize and two BoN. Poet in residence Haus-a-rest. Children’s Bafta nominated. www.scriptfirst.com. Instagram: @peterdevonald. Facebook: @pdevonald. Twitter/X: petedevonald