MRI
Multiple Sclerosis is a disease whereby the immune system attacks the brain, mistaking it for an intruder, and thus scarring the brain stem and resulting in disability.
The Hydrogen Protons of a brain flip to the tide-pull of magnetism.
The silver slip of a fish rolls in the jealous suck of low tide.
Brain cells stand to attention and line up like mug-shot criminals.
Every one of them a suspect. Was this YOU?
Is it you that is ruining me?
(It is strange to me to describe myself in such small terms.)
Hydrogen atoms that flip one way like a sequined cushion
a bored hand has stroked to make the shuffle uniform.
Right now the damage is contained within the scan image.
Bulbous medallions of lesions sequin my photograph,
So proud is my blood of its work!
I look away and so begins the gnaw
of the disgraced immunity turned mutinous
as Beetles gorge on a Sunflower stalk.
The nurse injects a purple ink that I can taste at the back of the throat.
I am a Biro-stained child caught scribbling over her bedroom walls..
Look at what you have done. Was this you?
Look at what you have done to yourself
Scarlett Ward is a queer disabled writer living with MS. Her collection ‘Ache’ was printed with Verve Press, and she was shortlisted for the UK Women Poets prize. She has featured on the BBC, was shortlisted for the Bridgeport poetry prize, and she set up her own publisher Fawn Press.